Dragon Training Lesson #2: Three Starring a Tough Town Hall 8

This is the first tutorial video we have done. This one is part of our first series called 'Dragon Training.' A special thanks to frankie for his execution of the 'plan' and a shout out to myself for providing said 'plan.' This base had given a few attackers fits before frankie burned it to the ground. Well done--as in the base was well done/3 starred.

Stayed tuned for more videos and subscribe to the channel. 

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Happy Thanksgiving from Battle Fresh

Turkeys, as the native Americans knew, are beguiling creatures filled with malice and deceit. The old saying goes, "Never trust a turkey." I think that's how it goes. IF it doesn't go like that--it should.

Turkeys, to me, have always represented more than a wish bone fight among youngsters around an aroma rich sanctuary. Turkeys, their resulting stuffing, mega drum sticks and moist white meat meant that another terrible beast met its justifiable fate and it was my duty to devour it--with cranberry sauce, gravy and two helpings of mashed potatoes.

Right about now you should be asking yourself, "Why in God's green kingdom is big joe talking so much about the evil turkeys?"

Good question! Turkeys to me are the clash of clans equivalent of dragons (that might make minions cornish hens, but I digress). We need to be ever vigilant against the dragons, and, as a clan, we are using the Thanksgiving (U.S. holiday) to take a break from war and focus on air defenses. This is especially important for our town hall 8 friends. Max those air defenses! Let's stop the turkeys...um dragons!!

So, Happy Thanksgiving to all and to all max your air defenses!! We war search on Monday, December 1st at 9:00 EST.

~ the management

Happy Holidays from Battle Fresh: Gift Card Give Away!

It's not easy being the most awesome clan in the known universe. We constantly try to find novel ways to be even more awesome (as if that was possible). We tried the rule of thirds (see New Coke), and, even though that went over like a Baby Ruth candy bar in a public pool, we stilled listen to the clan base and tried something in an attempt to be the most awesome clan possible.

Since we started this site, we have been trying to secure donations. Those donations we have been squirreling away for a special occasion--and guess what? We are feeling special about right now! For the remainder of the holiday season we will be giving out $10 gift cards to clanmates based on their seasonal, statistical output. Our leaders will be discussing those who are deserving. We will check our list twice.

With our main man Donovan keeping the stats together, we can now enact operation 'Holiday Giveaway!' Ho! Ho! Ho!

If you want to win a gift card, become a statistical monster. Raid a ton. Grab that gold and elixir. Donate. Win attacks. Be awesome! Check our stats page now for what we are looking for.

Check back here often to see who has won gift card winners.

Holiday Season 1 Winner: Ragess
Holiday Season 2 Winner: Alkalinex
Holiday Season 3 Winner: ethan_person24
Holiday Season 4 Winner: TBD

TBA = To Be Announced
TBD = To Be Decided

Dragon Training Lesson #1: Attacking a Spread out Defense

This is the first tutorial video we have done. This one is part of our first series called 'Dragon Training.' A special thanks to frankie for his execution of the 'plan' and a shout out to myself for providing said 'plan.' This base had given a few attackers fits before frankie burned it to the ground. Well done--as in the base was well done/3 starred. 

Stayed tuned for more videos and subscribe to the channel. 

Subscribe Here

An Interview with big joe: Talking Clash, Clan Wars and More

After many phone calls, emails, snail mail letters, texts and some rather abrupt door knocking, we were able to track down big joe, leader of the ridiculously awesome Battle Fresh clan, and ask him some pointed questions regarding, the game, life and about clan wars. What follows is an exact transcript of the interview.

Q: We have been told you are quite the tactician, is this true? And, if yes, where were you schooled? West Point?

big joe: I have no formal training. I learned Clash of Clans on the streets. I ran with a rough crowd. Mostly level 2 and 3 town halls in a backwards clan. Aimless, unmotivated, vulgar. Most times though it was just me and the goblin campaign. The goblins took me in and made me one of their own. Through their mentoring, I was able to learn how to deploy troops in an almost organized fashion; a precursor to what you are accustomed to seeing today.

Q: Since your legendary and almost meteoric rise to town hall 9, what has been your greatest take away?

big joe: In my two years of complete domination of this game, I have learned one infallible truth; do not rush your town hall.

Q: Why do you say not to rush a town hall? Do you speak from experience?

big joe: If you can name it...I rushed it. I rushed town hall 2. I didn't have dragons until town hall 9. I think I had level 3 cannons at town hall 7. All the rushing started taking a toll on my regular day to day life too. I started rushing everything. Red lights. Ice cubes. Rotisserie chicken. My life was a wreck. I went clanless for months roaming aimlessly in the abyss of global. People would make comments about my rushed town hall 9--it hurt.

Q: What happened that turned you around?

big joe: After giving the game up for while, my daughters showed spirited interest in Clash. I took that motivator to allow me to do the math and nerd up on the game. I began frequenting wikis, forums, websites, self-help groups--anything to give me Clash info. In short, my daughters made me the man I am today. I wanted to be their hero--their barb king.

Q: When did you become a leader?

big joe: Back at the end of May 2014, myself, a band of misfits from a previous clan, my daughters, and one extraordinary gentlemen going by the name of frankie sought out to make a difference in the Clash world. I started the clan 'Farm Fresh.' It was an immediate and unqualified success. We won wars, had fun, and the clan was growing. However, after some solid growth and an equally impressive win streak, we hit a road block when we ran into a stout Asian clan--we had our butts handed to us. It was clear things had to change, so we set out to create one clan solely for the serious war mongers--and from that fire Battle Fresh was born. I have been leader of that clan since July 2014.

Q: Has anyone inspired you or given you mentoring along the way?

big joe: No. Not at all. I am a self made man. Sweden? Who said anything about Sweden?! Q: Are you OK? Who are you talking to?  big joe: Ok, fine, there's this one person named Wuxia Tigerpaw. I learned like a tiny bit from her. It was only like this one thing. Wait? Website?? I know I didn't say anything about her website. Q: Seriously, are you OK? You are looking at the ceiling like it's talking to you. big joe: Alright, I did it! It's in the floorboards!! Her mentoring on global and her awesome website helped me lay the foundation for the organized clan Battle Fresh has become.

Q: I will act like none of that happened. What can you say about Clan Wars? What irks you the most?

big joe: Folks not attacking. It is like someone betrayed me. No wait, like someone was lazy and through their thoughtlessness they betrayed me. Wait, wait. It's like there was this bear and it went into hibernation, but usually this bear is pretty awesome, like most mammals, but then it suddenly just went dormant and everyone was like 'duh fuh?' That bear, usually awesome, but in hibernation is how I feel about non-attackers--wake up people, don't forget to be awesome!

Q: What do you like the most about clan wars?

big joe: Thrilling competition. I don't mind a two stars loss if it brings the clan closer together, but I really, really like a one star win on the last attack. It's theater. For those taking part from both clans, the clan war experience is just a gift when they are close. Sure, everyone loves a blowout to boast their ego, but a tough match is what makes us better.

Q: What else can you say about clan wars?

big joe: Looting is a frustrating thing. It's in many ways like a cancer or a very serious infectious disease. At first, theirs this one dude that's like, "Please, please, please Mr. big joe, let me attack #1 for loot." Then there are like four of those guys just begging for that chance. Soon, you have people holding off on making a solid attack with their second just so they can get the drop on some looting. After that, people no longer ask and anything goes. Pure anarchy isn't far off. Cats and dogs living together, fire and brimstone, real end of the world stuff. I would rather people use their second attacks to hone their skills and try to get three stars in a serious and useful fashion even if the war is no longer in question.

Q: Now for some easier questions. What's your favorite color?

big joe: Green. Wait, greenish blue green.

Q: Do you believe in big foot?

big joe: Yes! Wait, what? I don't think so. Does he bring the presents? Q: No. big joe: Than no.

Q: If you could mix two animals together to make a super animal what type of animal would it be?

big joe: A cat and a red panda because you know that would be non-stop cute. There would immediately be websites for LOLCRANDAS.

Q: Tell us one thing people don't know about you. 

big joe: I am not very smart, nor athletic, I am simply good at faking those sort of things. It's exhausting. When I am not putting on a show for others, I simply stare out at the wall.

Q: Thank you for your time and best of luck clashing.

big joe: Thank you, now go away!

What the Heck's a Co-Leader?

Co-Leaders are Elders on steroids.

Co-Leaders, the horse that makes the glue that keeps the clan together. Wait, that's a terrible analogy. Co-Leaders, the TV in the mini-van that keeps the kids happy. Closer. Co-Leaders, the Maginot Line that actually works. OK, let's go with that.

Co-Leaders are just as important as clan leaders and serve many purposes. They are the glue, the pacifiers and the last line of defense. Co-Leaders aren't clones of each other, in fact, I believe it's better to have different opinions and well thought discussions as long as they end up agreeing with my line of thought. I am very reasonable that way. Seriously though, Co-Leaders are Elders on steroids.

What's that you ask? How do I become a Co-Leader?? First, easy big fella! Slow down and familiarize yourself with our elder qualifications. Once you have caught up, it's time to find out what it takes to be a Co-Leader.

1. Active - When I say active, I mean embarrassingly, on more than one should be, having trouble holding down a job, failing at school, angry spouse active...minus all the bad stuff.
2. Donations - Yeah, it goes without saying that a Co-Leader will try to give away their house if a member asked for it in their donation request. 

3. 

   a Co-Leader will try to give away their house if a member asked for it in their donation request.

   War Leader - This is probably the biggest part of the Co-Leaders's job, they need to be able to help orchestrate the clan wars. This means posting claims on groupme, helping find targets for members, helping enforce clan war rules, being there to assist with war strategies and always remaining positive. An effective war leader doesn't act negative. Imagine General Patton throwing his hands up in the air and screaming like a baby at the first sound of a gunshot. It's courage that defines leaders--not negativity. 
4. Elder + - It should go without saying that a Co-Leader is everything an elder is and then some. 
5. Don't Ask - If you are begging for Co-Leader, you won't get it. Go out there and earn your wings. Man/Woman up and do what you need to do.

If you feel that Co-Leader is right for you, put on your elder hat first and then prove yourself to be Co-Material. 

If you aren't a Co-Leader or an Elder, no worries, being a member is an honor in itself. If you are looking for an easy Co or Elder, Battle Fresh isn't that clan. We accept the best and promote those looking to lead.

The Definitive Guide on How to Become an Elder

Lately, there has been much discussion regarding the question of 'How do I become an elder with the illustrious Battle Fresh clan?' First, let me say, you're welcome for being a part of your daily dose of awesomeness we call Battle Fresh. Second, good question. To be honest the reason there has been some disorder was due to the fact that we really haven't formally created a new system of qualifications since we did away with the 500 donation rule. In other words--poor management. I blame Farm Fresh--the player.

So, here's the list of qualifications we, the management of Battle Fresh, are looking for from our elders.

1. 1,000 donations a season
2. An enforcer of the clan rules (day to day rules and new recruit qualifications)
3. An active war participant (helping others make their war attacks, talking about yours and your strategy before making your attacks)
4. Being friendly, welcoming and helpful with new recruits--ensuring that they are well versed with clan rules--if you identify a new recruit who hasn't visited our site to read our rules, or someone who hasn't communicated in chat--it's your job to report that to the folks in charge via groupme or on Battle Fresh chat and let the leaders address it from there.

What we are looking for here is someone who represents the clan in the best way possible. The title of elder is a responsibility. If you simply want elder because you donate a lot, this is not the clan for you. If you are simply interested in elder because you have a really neat-o base, this is not the clan for you. If you want to help the clan grow and if you are willing to help by setting the right example and by being active than this is the clan for you--and elder is coming.

Coming soon...What the Heck's a Co-Leader?